Since my last random entry was about Turnoffs, it was only fitting to write an entry in opposition to that. Weirdly enough, I’d have to say my turnons are a bit more strange than my turnoffs. I don’t have your average, everyday, “If he has blue eyes, I love him!” turnons whatsoever. Sometimes, I even surprise myself at the things that get me going. I don’t need a guy to possess every single one of these characteristics, but it’s nice to have a few, if not more. If I found a guy who was all of these things, you can be sure I’m making him my husband ASAP. Again, like the turnoffs, I could go on and on forever about the things I love about men. But I will stick to just 10. So here, are my top 10 turnons (in no particular order):
1.) Musicians (especially singers) – Gosh, I could go on and on about this for days. I love musicians. Having been brought up around music my entire life and being encouraged to perform, I think this idea of musicians being sexy was instilled in my brain long before I even liked men (which was when I was 3 years old…yes I’ve liked guys since the age of 4). I love them all: guitarists, drummers, bassists, cellists, violinists, pianists. In fact, a guy doesn’t even have to be remotely good looking, but if he rocks his instrument, I’m in love. I especially love guys who can sing. Now when I say I love musicians, I’m not talking about wannabe musicians who say they are, but don’t know what you’re talking about when you tell them to play you an augmented chord or a song in a minor key. I’m talking about musicians who truly know their stuff – who can play so smoothly you get the chills. When it comes to singing, I like a guy who can truly sing. A lot of guys claim they can sing, yet they’re pitchy, or breathy, or nasally, or just have something off about their tone. And since I have such a keen ear when it comes to music, I can tell when a person is even remotely flat or sharp. So I like guys who can, for lack of better words, sing my pants right off of me!
2.) Athletes (especially soccer players) – I love athletes, but perhaps not for the same reason that most women do. Most women like them because they’re hot, they (usually) make good money, and are famous. I like athletes because they’re in great shape (yes, I understand this is a bit vain) which means they take good care of themselves. Being so obsessed with fitness myself, I like a guy who takes care of his body and wants to look good. Also, athletes are usually very passionate about their craft, which is super sexy in itself. As far as soccer players are concerned, I’ve loved them since I was a little kid. I remember running around at recess in 4th grade playing soccer, just so I could hang out with one of the boys who loved the sport (I wonder whatever happened to him…). In fact, 50% of the men I’ve slept with are soccer players. Enough said.
3.) Guys who have ambitions, goals, and dreams – Nothing is sexier than a guy who has dreams for himself; who has some direction in life and has an idea of what he wants his life to be like. I’ve dated plenty of men who had no ambitions, no goals….it was heartbreaking. How can any guy (or anyone in general, for that matter) not have any dreams for themselves?? I don’t care if your dream is something big like becoming a huge rock star or something small like owning your own home someday…have some damn ambitions!! To me, a guy with no goals is a guy who doesn’t really care about himself…who sees himself as a miniscule, insignificant thing in this world. And I just cannot tolerate that. A guy who has goals usually has a level head and has the drive to get what he wants – he’s usually not lazy and doesn’t take no for an answer. That’s what I like.
4.) Guys who are intelligent – I don’t know who came up with the stereotype that dumb jocks are hot, because they’re not. I’d rather myself a nerdy, intelligent man than some cocky jock who doesn’t know the difference between “their,” “there,” and “they’re.” There’s nothing more exhausting in this world than hanging out with a man who lacks brains. I feel like I’m talking to a child, or maybe even something below that. Plus with stupid guys, I usually have to explain what I’m talking about, which gets irritating when I have to stop my story every few minutes just to explain something. I like a guy who can keep up with conversation, someone who is learned about the world, who has good things to say because he is informed, and can make intelligent opinions. I don’t care if we end up disagreeing on something…as long as what you’re saying is formed with intelligence, we’re good.
5.) Guys who believe in chivalry – I hate when people say chivalry is dead, because if you find the right guy, it’s not. Well, okay, maybe it’s not full-on 100% still in existence, but traces of it still exist and that’s all that matters. I like a guy who opens doors for me, who lets me pass first, who will pay for me just because he wants to, who treat women like we’re God’s gift to the world, because let’s face it – we are. I’m not saying I need a guy to pull out my chair every single time I get up or want to sit down, or a guy who pays for every single thing I want in life, but here and there is always nice. It makes a woman feel like she’s being taken care of, and I think at the end of the day that’s all we want.
6.) Guys who read on a frequent basis – Now when I say read, I don’t mean comic books, anime, or the sports section in the newspaper (although that may be one of my favorite parts of the newspaper). I’m talking about actual reading: a novel, a non-fiction book, a script, etc. Something of substance that has some meaning and helps the mind grow in one way or another. And not just reading because one is forced to read in school, but reading for pleasure. Reading is a great way to improve daily vernacular and can be extremely beneficial in day-to-day conversation. Also, this goes back to the whole intelligence thing – reading is stereotyped as a hobby done by people of intelligence (which is not always true), so if you’re going to be stereotyped, why not be stereotyped with something positive? =)
7.) A guy’s guy – While there is nothing wrong with a more gentle, effeminate man, I would date a sexy gay guy if that’s what I wanted. Let’s face it, gays take WAY better care of themselves than straight guys do. Anyways, I like a guy who watches and plays sports, drinks beer, eats shitty food, and leaves the toilet seat up. Yep. I said it. If a guy is too feminine, it freaks me out. For a girl, even though I love to dress up and look pretty, I also love getting dirty, throwing the football, and participating in chugging contests with the best of them. If a guy can’t keep up with that masculine side of me, we’re in trouble. I don’t want someone who is more feminine than me – I’m supposed to be the girl in the relationship, not him!
8.) Guys who actually listen to what I’m saying – While it is well-known that men don’t listen very well and often forget what women say, I’ve dated enough men who remembered the things I have said. Because of this, there is no excuse for a guy to forget the things I’ve told him. Now, I know no one is perfect and a guy will forget things here and there. Women do too. But if I tell you something of some pertinence, I expect you to remember it. Nothing is hotter than me telling a guy something that I really like or dislike, and then a couple months down the road he mentions it. It shows me that he actually paid attention to me and wasn’t just staring at my tits or something.
9.) Guys who do what they say they’re going to do – I think a big reason why women don’t trust men anymore is because they’re fucking flakey as shit. I can’t even tell you the amount of times I’ve had men tell me they were going to do one thing, and then never did it. So when I find a guy who actually does what he says he’s going to do, it’s completely attractive. I hate flakes in general, both men and women, so I already have a problem with flakey people. Guys who actually keep true to their word are easier to trust and gives me (and I’m sure many women out there) reassurance that there are still some good guys in the world.
10.) Guys who are confident – Confidence is huge in a guys sex appeal. I like a guy who is completely sure of himself and knows his worth. A guy who walks around like he knows he’s awesome and isn’t afraid to tell the world. Granted, too much confidence (a.k.a. being cocky) is disgusting, but just the right amount of confidence is the sexiest thing a guy can wear.
I don’t really have a type when it comes to men, but I think my turnons and turnoffs can really give a person an idea of my “type” of guy.