Tag Archive | Alcohol

UPDATES, UPDATES, Read all about them!!

Well it’s time for another update!!!  🙂  I’m not sure how interesting this is going to be (sorry) since I’m a fairly boring individual.  But I hope you still enjoy it nevertheless.

Moi: So again, I’m a fairly boring individual.  In the short hiatus I took from here, I was busy (and I guess still kind of am) catching up with people I hadn’t seen in a very long time and just living life.  I’m currently in hiatus at one of my jobs at the moment so I’ve had a bunch of free time.  I’ve also been in the process of looking for a new job in hopes to move to the city.  Also, I just get bored really easily and need a job that’s more intriguing.  But being the impatient soul I am, I’ve just been getting super frustrated and I know eventually I will just give up.  Because I suck like that.  What I really should be doing during this wonderful little break I have been given is work on my passion and what I really want to do…which is perform.  Specifically, sing.  Here’s a little snippet (or 2) of me singing, hopefully it spices up this post since I’m already bored just writing it:

So yeah, really that’s what I should be working on.  But I’m not.  😦  I’ve also become a bit of a homebody…like probably more so than I should.  My BFF “Tinky Winky Pooh Bear” read my tarot cards while she was in town (ya, I’m weird like that) and my immediate future pulled the hermit card so I guess it all makes sense??  Maybe something is wrong with me….

Sad, the website where I found this pic was about clinical depression...

Sad, the website where I found this pic was about clinical depression…

“Mr. Big (Present)”: So things are officially, 100% over with this one, and I couldn’t be happier.  I had randomly noticed one day that he had deleted me off of Facebook.  But I gave him the benefit of the doubt because sometimes Facebook will just delete your friends for no reason.  It’s dumb, really.  Actually, the fact that I’m even writing about him deleting me off Facebook is pretty dumb in itself as well…just let it happen though.  Haha.  Anyways, I asked him about it and he did indeed himself delete me.  He said it was because he had no reason to talk to some of the girls from his past, that he had deleted not just me but some other girls, and that it wasn’t personal.  Funny thing is, he was JUST talking to me a week or so before this happened…. Anyways, I asked him if his girlfriend caught him sneaking around, and he claimed she didn’t.  It’s very unlike him to do something like that all of a sudden though so either 1.) He’s super serious about this girl…like SUPER serious or 2.) He got caught, even if he won’t admit it.  I was kind of a bitch back to him, told him that I hope he had deleted my number too so I wouldn’t be getting phone calls when him and his girlfriend inevitably break up, and thankfully he did (or so he says).  Anyways, I think this kind of put closure on the whole situation, and while initially I was kind of confused why he would do it, and maybe even a tad bit hurt, because I thought of us as somewhat of friends in a way, I’m happy he did.  It needed to be done.  After this, I deleted his number as well, so now there’s no way to communicate with him, even if I was tempted.  🙂

"Mr. Big (Present)" wishes this could be his life everyday.  Also, I just really love everyone in this picture, so I wanted to post it.

“Mr. Big (Present)” wishes this could be his life everyday. Also, I just really love everyone in this picture, so I wanted to post it.

“Snoop”: I still get texts from this guy occasionally, telling me he was thinking about  me and that he hopes I’m doing well.  He did text me right before Christmas asking if I wanted to hang out for Christmas which I thought was really strange because we barely know one another, so of course I declined.  I’m not sure if he’s just bored or he still has some hope, but nothing will come of it.

“Secret Sleaze”: A couple of days after our date, he asked me if I wanted to go to dinner.  I was so tired from having been up so late almost every night that week so I declined.  Then he asked me if I wanted to do dinner the next night instead.  I had already had plans with some of my girlfriends, so again I declined, but said if he wanted to come hang out with me and the girls he was more than welcomed (obviously I was only saying this to be nice).  To this he responded with, “Are you calling me a girl?!”  which I didn’t think was a funny joke at all.  So this is when we got in our discussion of why he always made fun of himself and he said he just likes to make people laugh and that he’s learned that not everyone is going to like you and that’s okay.  Not sure what that had to do with him making fun of himself but okay.  Basically, I told him he came off as insecure since he kept making fun of himself and justifying the shit he said instead of just owning it, but that that was just my opinion.  To which his response was, “And you’re allowed to have your own opinion” or something like that.  WELL NO SHIT!!  Clearly, he’s not the smartest crayon in the box.  Anyways, that was the last bit of correspondence we’ve had – I think he got the picture.

And the one you’ve all been waiting for…..

“Future Hubby” –  So I had a whole thing written out for this one as far as an update was concerned, but then I realized I was just ranting.  So to sum us up in a nutshell, we’re basically a roller coaster.  Not a really crazy one that makes you want to puke and pee your pants, but a moderate one.  We’re definitely a work in progress, maybe a bit more so than most.

So I’m definitely competing for his attention with another bitch, and I’m not enjoying that one bit.  You know what that bitches name is?  Alcohol.  Yep.  I usually win and don’t have to compete with her very often, but when I do, it’s not very fun at all.  So after I wrote the last post about him, I kind of backed off.  But then I missed him too much, so I started talking to him again.  I’m trying this thing this year where if I want to do something or talk to someone or say something, I’m just going to do it.  I’m not going to think about the dumb things that we ladies like to overthink sometimes.  I’m just going to do it.  So yes we started talking again and things were going well.  We’d go out, have fun, come back and do our thing (which also is a work in progress – I’m teeny tiny, he’s big – things that are only supposed to happen when you first lose your v-card happens – in large quantities…yeah), go to sleep, then hang out for a bit in the morning.   And then of course this week, not only was he not responding to anything I was texting him, I bumped into him at a bar and he was so drunk that he was by himself and didn’t even know where he was really.  We fought pretty much the entire night, but it was like fighting with a child because he was so drunk.  At times, I just had to laugh because it was so ridiculous.  Apparently he had never received any of my texts from this week, and while usually I wouldn’t believe that shit, I’ve been having problems with contacting iPhones for some reason so it’s very possible he never got them.  The week prior, his phone kept automatically rejecting my calls and he’d have to call me back every single time.  I had this problem with “Indian Warrior” too so I know he wasn’t just rejecting my calls….maybe this means I need to upgrade from ghetto phone to smart phone?  Anyways, in our jaunt back to my car, he made a friend along the way who lectured us in relationships and love, even though we both kept telling him we weren’t together, nor were we anywhere near being in love.  But the guy kept telling us he saw something good and that he could tell we’d be really good together.  Is that a sign??

Hahaha....but seriously....

Hahaha….but seriously….

Anyways, so yes this is our situation.  When it’s good, it’s very good.  He’s caring, sweet, makes me laugh, is super attentive, makes sure I’m comfortable, I can have good conversation with him and he’s seriously just everything that I like in a guy.  And about 90% of the time that’s how it is.  And then there’s the 10% that usually involves a copious amount of alcohol.  A week or so ago, I did bring up the fact that I didn’t think he was making a very good effort and that I was making more of an effort than he was, to which he disagreed and said that I don’t make enough of an effort either.  And while this conversation did happen while we were both drunk, he had a good point.  I could probably make more of an effort myself.

I guess my concluding point here is that I’m going to stick this one out.  I really do like him and care about him, and I’ve honestly never felt this way before.  I don’t even know how to describe the feeling…it’s not like in the past where I was super infatuated with the person and would be a crazy person and have my life and thoughts consumed by said person and what not.  It’s just…different.  A good different.  I actually WANT to see him all the time, and WANT to hang out with him all the time, unlike all those others in the past where I didn’t really care if I saw them very often or not.  I think it kind of goes back to  my belief of a relationship being two individuals coming together and sharing their lives together, in opposed to how most people believe it should be two people becoming one person.  I do realize it’s going to take time and a LOT of patience, but they say if you really want something you should fight for it, so that’s what I’m going to do.  I just hope I’m not doing it in vain.

When I saw this, I immediately thought of "Future Hubby".  Hahaha.

When I saw this, I immediately thought of “Future Hubby”. Hahaha.

And to end this all….sorry this is so long…but a question for you all:

What do you want to see me do with my blog?  I’m still kind of in the process of figuring out what to do with it.  I can still continue on with what I’m doing, because I don’t see myself getting serious with “Future Hubby” anytime in the near future.  I could also write some more about my past dating, such as one of the guys who lead me to write this blog.  I guess I’m just still a little lost still as to what to do with this blog.  I’m also thinking about starting a new blog with all my past poetry and maybe some new stuff – I hope that some of you will follow me, even if you hate poetry!!  I promise it won’t be the bland stuff of the past!!  🙂


Date #25.1: “High Roller”

(Note: Refer to Date #25: “High Roller” for the background to this particular date.  Also, this wasn’t exactly a date date, but it kind of turned into one…sort of.)

So during our first date, “High Roller” and I had decided to hang out the weekend following our date for some drinks and what not downtown.  I was under the impression that we were going to go to a quite/low key bar and just have a couple of drinks and enjoy each other’s presence.  Considering the fact during the last day we had agreed that we are “old” and that we prefer low-key atmospheres at times in opposed to crazy, 21-year-old filled bars, I think my assumption was fair.

On the day we were supposed to hang out, he texted me to confirm that we were still hanging out.  Honestly, I was pretty excited to hang out with him.  After our date, I was so happy to find someone who was down to just hang out and chill at a nice, quiet bar instead of getting fucked up and crazy.  Most of my friends (who I love to death, so to all of you who still party like this, don’t take this the wrong way!!) are all about just getting super drunk and crazy every weekend, so it’s refreshing to have a change of pace.  Again, being under the impression that we were just going to go to a dessert bar across from my work, I told him to just meet me at my work since I wouldn’t be off till 10pm anyways.  To this, I received a response that he was getting drunk with his friends and that he would try to stay somewhat sober by the time I got there.  While I wasn’t pissed, I was definitely a bit irritated because this meant two things: 1.) We wouldn’t be hanging out at a quiet, low-key bar that night and 2.) He’d already be fairly wasted by the time I met up with them.  Usually, when I make my mind up about how my night is going to go (either low-key or just having fun at the bars/clubs), I intend for it to go the way I had planned – I don’t like getting crazy and drinking a ton when I wanted a low-key night and vice versa.  On the occasion, it’s a nice surprise, but not that night.

So while getting ready, I had made up my mind that I wouldn’t be staying out late and that I wouldn’t be drinking very much either, because I’d rather have a couple of drinks then just head home.  I had stuff to do in the morning anyways.  So I go to meet up with “High Roller” and his friends, who just happened to be at the Oktoberfest festival.  Since I had done that the previous weekend, I was already over it.  When I got there, they were already pretty drunk and I was sober so it already sucked.  In addition to that, apparently “High Roller” had already planned out to have me drive him home, because then his friends immediately left.  So it ended up just being us two for the rest of the night.  I wanted to be closer to my car, so I made the suggestion that we meander towards the bars by my car.  Also, I wanted to visit “Boss Man” and maybe (if he was so nice…which he was) snag a complimentary drink or two.  So we walked towards the direction.  During our walk, I became really cold and “High Roller” was nice enough to give me his hoodie, even though I refused it numerous times.  He also offered to get me a cab if I didn’t want to walk since I was in stilettos.  So he definitely gets some brownie points for that.

We get to the bar and have a couple of drinks.  I’m not going to lie, by then, the only thing I wanted to do was socialize with everyone and I kind of started ignoring “High Roller”.  Not his fault by any means, but I guess he can’t keep my attention for very long….anyways, we bumped into a few people that I work with on occasion and I also chatted with “Boss Man” and his co-worker who I had met a couple of months ago for awhile as well.  I felt kind of bad for ignoring him, but I’m such a social butterfly when it comes to places like that, guys that I date just have to understand this.  Honestly, he would have been better off if he hadn’t had his friends leave him with me (they made some comment that they were leaving since I was now there, which gets me to think he had this planned out the entire time ).  Eventually I got tired and we ended up heading home.

We drove back to his place, I went pee there, and then I went home.  He tried to get me to stay, but I only live like 5 minutes away so I declined.  I did, however, promise to text him that I was okay when I got home.  And this is where things kind of got weird.  I get home, and text him, and he texts me back something about how I should have stayed to cuddle or some shit like that.  To this, I responded that I don’t like cuddling (which is somewhat true).  My phone died, but I read the next morning that he had texted me back something about how other things would make up for cuddling, which I just ignored.

*Positives: He truly is a wonderful guy and a complete gentleman for giving me his hoodie when I was cold, offering to call a cab when I didn’t want to walk in my heels, and sticking around with me when I did my social thing, but….

*Negatives: If he only has the guts to try to hit on me when he’s drunk, then that’s just not going to cut it.  Plus, he’s not as fun drunk as he is sober, and that’s just not okay.  Plus, I am still not attracted to him.  I know, no one is perfect, and I am not expecting perfection from any one person.  But all this tells me is that if I’m not willing to forgo these little nit picky things, then he’s just not the one for me.

Date #22: “The Hangovers”, “Oldie” and “Bartender (1 and 2)”

Note: This wasn’t an actual legitimate date, but I am counting it based on the context of the situation.  It was like 3 vignettes of a date if anything.

How We Met: I took a trip this past weekend to the city known for its windy ways.  I spent most of my first day there just exploring the city by myself since my cousin who had met up with me couldn’t stay and my friend who I was staying with was still at work.  I window shopped, went to the beach and laid out, went up to an observatory to look at views of the city, but after awhile I was getting super lonely, not having talked to a single person (in a legitimate conversation) in hours.  I finally decided to do the one thing I know how to do well: go get some dinner and have a drink.  Since cops roam the city there quite freely, I decided to ask them for some suggestions.  A restaurant I hadn’t heard of was recommended to me and was only a block away so I decided to go there.  Initially, I thought I would be a complete outsider considering the fact that I was in my swimsuit with just a short little dress on, no makeup on whatsoever, hair having sand in it, and the restaurant/bar seemed a bit fancy.  But I learned quickly that I fit right in.  I sat myself in between some men at the bar, and that’s where it all began.

-Rating (sorry, this might get confusing):

*Physical Aesthetics: “The Hangovers” – 8; “Oldie” – 7 (for his age); “Bartender 1” – 9; “Bartender 2” – 6 (I kind of don’t remember what he looks like…)

*Appearance: “The Hangovers” – 8; “Oldie” – 7; “Bartender 1” and “Bartender 2” – they were wearing uniforms, but I’ll give them both a 10

*Personality: 10 for everyone

*Manners: 10 for everyone

*Intelligence: 8 for everyone

*Confidence: “The Hangovers” – 8; “Oldie” – 9; “Bartender 1” and “Bartender 2” – 10

*Overall Rating: 10 for everyone!!

The “Dates”:

I’m not sure how speed dating works since I have never been on a speed date (which I do need to get to doing soon here…), but I can only imagine it would be something similar to this.  Or at least I would like it to be something like this.  The minute I sat down at the bar, I had men talking to me at all sides (except behind me).  “Bartender 1” greeted to me and offered me a drink, one of the guys from “The Hangovers” (I’m collectively calling their group this) immediately starts talking to me, and eventually “Oldie” began to talk to me as well.  I’m assuming a competition was going on between “Bartender 1” and “Bartender 2” because then they both started speaking to me and tried to be “my” bartender.  We all shot the shit for a good while, at least an hour or so.

“Bartender 1” – The first thing I thought of when I saw this one was how attractive he was.  I’m not a huge fan of blondes, but this one was so handsome!  Tall, built well, and so sweet.  It turns out he’s from Michigan and had moved down to the city with a girlfriend about 2 years ago.  It didn’t work out with his girlfriend (of course it didn’t) but he loved it there so much and was making good money at his job there at the restaurant that he stayed.  He said he makes a lot of money working in the industry and that no matter what bar you work at, you’re going to make some good money.  I told him how I was thinking about moving out there and he gave me a suggestion of some bars I could apply to where I was guaranteed to be hired.  He also gave me suggestions on places to eat/drink while I was in town and told me if I called “Bartender 2” that we could all hang out.  I don’t know much about “Bartender 2” since he kind of just started talking to me out of nowhere when he was never my bartender to begin with, but he was cool too.  He ended up giving me his number and told me to call him so we could hang out while I was in town.  Unfortunately, I wasn’t able to hang out with either of them because of scheduling and just being busy in general.  Hopefully they are still there when and if I end up moving out there, or even if I just visit again!

“The Hangovers” – The reason why I’ve chosen this nickname is because this was the group of guys to my right who were in town having their “Hangover” type weekend.  Apparently, they’re friends from awhile ago and they’re all married, but every year, once a year, they pick a city to go to and hang out with just the guys for the whole weekend.  During this weekend, they get extremely drunk, tour whatever city they are in, and go to games (this time they were going to a Cubs vs. Rockies game).  They’re all around their late 30’s/early 40’s and were super sweet.  I honestly can’t remember any of their names even though we all did a bunch of introductions, but I do know that one is from Dallas/Fort Worth and one was from Argentina.  Also, one of their friends who came later had made a bet with them about last years fantasy football and lost, so had to shave his beard into a mustache.  He came in all mustached out, having it turned up on the sides and everything.  He also had us all feel his face (since he went to a barber to get it done) and it literally did feel like a baby’s butt hahaha.  They were all super nice and super sweet and super respectful.  In fact, the one who initially started talking to me accidentally touched my leg and kind of freaked out, apologizing profusely.  It was very sweet and cute.  They’re all super devoted to their families and wives, they just like to do the once a year “Guy’s Night” weekend.  They all wished me the best of time while I was in the city and headed off, extremely inebriated, into the night.

“Oldie” – I didn’t even take notice of “Oldie” initially because, well…he is old.  Like really old (for me), probably in his 50’s or so.  But we started talking as well when I told him I was in town for the weekend.  He himself was in town for a business trip and is originally from Boston but has lived in New Jersey for some time now.  He works in sales (didn’t specify what exactly) and apparently visits that restaurant every time he’s in town (if you’re all curious, the restaurant is Ditka’s and I highly recommend it because it’s delicious).  “Bartender 1” mentioned this area of bars called the Viagra Triangle, and “Oldie” pressed him for more details about this area, being completely serious.  So I’m assuming “Oldie” is quite the dirty old bastard.  He was leaving the city the next morning and then traveling to Brazil for more business, so whatever “sales” job this guy has seems to be pretty good.

Honestly, the main thing to take away from this “date” is that it made me realize just how much is out there and how much I haven’t discovered yet.  Like I said in one of my previous posts, I was getting super sad with everyone finding someone to be with and me not having even a single soul.  But after this encounter, I’ve decided that I’m perfectly fine without someone and there’s million of guys out there I have yet to experience.  So all in all, this was an amazing experience for me.

*Positives: They were all really nice and super polite, I got free drinks from “Bartender 1” & “Bartender 2”, I got great recommendations of places to go, I had a wonderful first night in the city because of them…the list could go on, honestly they were all so great!

*Negatives: “Bartender 1” and “Bartender 2” don’t live anywhere near me, “The Hangovers” are all married, “Oldie” is too old.

Second First Date?: Well I think it’s fairly clear that a date will never happen between “The Hangovers” (they’re married) nor with “Oldie” (he’s too old).  But the other two…possibly.  I’d prefer “Bartender 1” over “Bartender 2” but I’d be willing with either.

Date #14: “Youngin”

How We Met: We met some time ago at a mutual friend’s house party.  I had always thought he was cute, but he’s quite a bit younger than me, so I never though of him as more than a friend/acquaintance.  Not that I have anything against younger guys (I usually go for them in opposed to older), but he’s just a bit more younger than I would prefer.  In fact, one party that we were at, the little fucker lied to me about his age.  He told me he was a year older than he really was.  You’d think it was only women who did that, but no guys do this too!!  Anyways, it had been awhile since we had seen each other and we hadn’t really talked in awhile, with the exception of a few Facebook comments here and there.  The other day, he messaged me on Facebook chat, we talked a bit and he asked me out.  So yeah. Haha.


*Physical Aesthetics: 8

*Appearance: 9

*Personality: 7

*Manners: 6

*Intelligence: 6, though again, like my previous date, we didn’t really talk about anything where I was able to determine this

*Confidence: 10

*Overall Rating: 8

The Date:  So this date started off fairly strange to begin with.  He had me meet him at a hospital so we could see his friend who was injured in a horse accident the other day.  Don’t get me wrong, I do feel very badly for his friend since his friend was thrown off a horse and now has internal bleeding with a cracked skull.  I can’t even imagine how I would feel if one of my friends were in that situation.  But I just thought it was kind of strange that he wanted me to come with him to visit his friend considering 1.) I’ve never met this guy before and 2.) I feel like I would almost be intruding by showing up to visit him since I don’t know him.  Fortunately for me, when we went into the ICU to try and visit him, we weren’t allowed to for some reason.  So we decided to leave.

Neither of us really knew what to do.  I suggested going to grab a drink at a nearby bar or restaurant bar, which he didn’t want to do.  He suggested we just go hang out at his house…I think we all know what that suggests, so I wasn’t into that.  We settled on buying some shooters and driving up one of the mountains and just hanging out.  Initially I thought we were going to go to the popular “spot” that all the college kids go to (one that I went to myself quite a bit when I was in college), but instead we took another road and went to a more remote spot.  Honestly, this spot was BEAUTIFUL!!  It’s very secluded with VERY few lights, so you could see the stars perfectly!!  We parked the car a few feet from the edge of a cliff and sat there on the front of his car, drinking shooters, and looking at the stars.  Then I was forced to make out with “Youngin”, and not wanting to be rude, I did so.  A couple of times.  In between looking at the stars.  I’m pretty sure he was a lot drunker than he led on, because he repeated a lot of the same things over and over again and he was also being super cheesy with the things he said (refer to He Said WHAT?! for this one’s contributions).  In fact, now that I think about it, he may have even been high.  He was speaking really slowly and laughing A LOT.   Granted, he had warned me initially that he was going to be completely inappropriate, and he did not fail to deliver.  Though it was sweet, at one point he had told me that he has always thought I was pretty.  That one made me smile for sure =).  After about an hour of him throwing cheesy lines my way and making every attempt to get me to make out (or maybe in his mind, hook up…haha ya right), we made our way back into town and just drove around for a bit.  I like fast cars and he just got a new one, so he drove around fast for a bit which was fun.  He then dropped me off at my car (still parked at the hospital) and we parted ways.

Honestly, this whole date reminded me of Katy Perry’s song “Teenage Dream.”  It was seriously like one of those dates you had in high school or maybe even freshman year of college where you snuck bottles of alcohol to secluded places and drank.  Only, we aren’t under age.  Not gonna lie either, I had a great time!  It was like reminiscing back to the days where the only thing you really worried about was what you were going to wear to school the next day.  It was fun. 🙂

Positives: Had lots of fun with him, he’s a nice guy, has a pretty car, he’s cute, very sweet

Negatives: Wears WAY too much cologne (seriously, I smelled like him the next day), is super young, most definitely acts his young age (despite what people apparently tell him), immature (though he warned me about this)

*Second Date?: Yea I would for sure.  But I couldn’t see anything happening with him, especially based on his maturity…or more so lack thereof.

Date #10: “Booze Talker”

How We Met: It’s actually a sweet little story as to how we met.  I was a freshman in high school and “Booze Talker” was a sophomore.  One day at lunch, he randomly came and sat down at my table and introduced himself to all us ladies at the table.  We’ve been friends since then.  We had choir together and often hung out then, but after high school we lost touch, until just recently when he moved back to the area after graduating college.  I had always thought he was attractive, but I never pursued anything really.  This is technically not our first date by any means (at least I’ve been told it’s not…it’s complicated), but our first since I’ve started this blog.


*Physical Aesthetics: 7

*Appearance: 7-8

*Personality: 6

*Manners: 7

*Intelligence: 5-6

*Confidence: 6-7

*Overall Rating: 7

The Date:  It went well and a lot  better than I thought really.  Like I said previously, I have gone out with “Booze Talker” before I had started this blog, and it’s usually one of the most uncomfortable things ever.  Don’t get me wrong, he’s a nice guy and I do enjoy hanging out with him.  But he usually directs many sexual innuendos towards me and all I can think is, “WTF…”  He’s also very short (he says 5’5″ but I’m pretty sure he really means 5’3″ or shorter), so he most definitely has a Napolean complex.  I recall the last time we hung out I had sarcastically made some comment about his drug use and he got VERY upset.  And it wasn’t just upset about the situation…you could tell it was related to “short man syndrome.”  He kept telling me that he was going to take me out if I didn’t stop and honestly…I just kept going.  I’m a bitch and I thought it was funny to get him all upset.  Finally he calmed down, but after that I most definitely thought something was definitely wrong with him.

So I was most definitely apprehensive that the date would go as it has previously gone in the past with him trying to play the “macho” card due to his complex and spitting out sexual innuendos towards me.  I was happily surprised when he was actually calm and apparently on his best behavior.  We went to my favorite bar/restaurant and just had some drinks and caught up on life.  The sexual innuendos were to a very minimum (I think he only said 2 things, but then we both laughed afterwards) and he didn’t get all Napolean complexy on me.  Thank god.  You know, I never understood why it is that short men can have a Napolean complex but short women (such as myself) usually relish in it.  Weird.  Anyhoo…a big part of why I think he used to act that way towards me is because I think he may have liked me for a bit and was trying to impress me (most definitely didn’t work).  But I think he’s over that because he even asked me if I was dating anyone and told me about his weekend in where he made-out with some random girl.  It’s most definitely a relief to know he does not have any interest in me anymore…I think it really livens up our situation and keeps things from getting awkward.

The one thing he did not stray from, however, is his penchant for talking about partying, drinking, and drug use non-stop.  Seriously…that’s really the only thing he can talk about on a consistent basis.  Now, I know that many dates or just conversations in general with people in their 20’s usually consists of one of those topics every so often.  But “Booze Talker” could talk about this for days.  He told me how this past weekend he had taken some form of THC that was so strong that he was high for days.  I think his story lasted the majority of the night.  If a person didn’t know better, just based on the things he talks about (partying, drinking, and drugs), you’d think all he did with his life was get really fucked up every single day.  It’s really sad and pathetic, and makes me think that is honestly the only thing he knows about.  We even tried talking about musicals and plays, and lo and behold, he found a way to incorporate drinking and drug-use into that!!  He suggested we go see a show at my work but beforehand, get super high and drink.  I’m sorry, but I’m not paying $50 something just to get high and drunk.  So dumb.

Anyways, besides his predicted “booze talking,” the date went very well.  I enjoyed it, he enjoyed it.  It was a good night.

*Positives: He’s a nice guy, we always have a good time together, he’s great company, he’s always down for a good time

*Negatives: He totally has a Napolean complex, all he can talk about is boozing, partying, and drugs, he’s super short

Second Date?: Sure.  But as far as dating him on a consistent basis, that would never happen.  His boozing and partying conversationalist ways are just too much for me.

Date #4: “D-Bag”

Note: This was technically not a date, but due to the nature of the situation (read on) I’m counting it as one.  Rightfully so, after you read the following.

How We Met: We were set up through a mutual friend who liked my blog idea and wanted to help me out with it.  He set me up with one of his friends from school.  “D-Bag” added me on Facebook, which is where we started talking and then we started talking through text.  He seemed very nice, fairly intelligent, and we appeared to have a lot in common.  Based on his Facebook, he seemed like a pretty decent looking guy.  My only issue was his age (22) but since I’m being open, I decided to disregard this small factor.


*Physical Aesthetics: 5-6

*Appearance: 6

*Personality: 4

*Manners: 4

*Intelligence: 5-6 (this is just a guess though, considering we didn’t have anything close to a stimulating conversation whatsoever)

*Confidence: 1 & 10 (I’ll explain this later)

*Overall Rating: 4

The “Date”: So there needs to be some backstory given for this “date.”  We had initially planned on going on a date last Sunday (not yesterday, but the week before yesterday).  Now at this point, we hadn’t met in person, we were just friends on Facebook and had been talking through text.  We were trying to come up with ideas of what to do Sunday, so Sunday around noon, I text him to see if he came up with any ideas for the day.  I was at work, so I wouldn’t have been off till about 3 or 3:30 anyways.  His response to this is that he was super hungover and he wanted to know if he could reschedule the date to Tuesday instead (I had given him the option of either doing the date on Sunday or Tuesday).  First off, who the fuck cancels on a date because they are hungover?!  Especially a date where they’re supposed to be meeting the person for the first time.  Secondly, who the hell is cocky enough to think that the second date option given would still be available?!  I’m a hot bitch and am extremely social – my weeks fill up pretty quick.  As I tell everyone, you have to book me in advance if you want to hang out (best friends are excluded from this because I love them so much I make time for them even when I’m busy.  =) ).  And here comes along this guy who just ASSUMES I’m available.  That for sure irritated me, so he was already on my shit list.  And this proved to me his age, because I feel a mature, older (in both age and mind) man would not have pulled this “Woe is me, I am hungover” bullshit. But, again, for the sake of writing, I decided to not go off on his ass and hope that the date would still go through eventually.

So come Saturday, “D-Bag” texts me again, seeing what I’m doing that night.  I initially thought he was wanting to take me on a date or seeing if I wanted to hang out.  But no, he just wanted to see if I was coming downtown.  Initially, he mentioned nothing of getting together.  Though, towards the time when our texting was coming to an end for the day, he told me to let me know if I was coming downtown so he could come say hi to me.

I get downtown to hangout with some friends and text him where I am at.  He says he is coming to meet me, yet I hear nothing from him.  The night progresses, and I’m already maybe 5 drinks in, and he finally texts me again, asking me where I’m at.  Though at this point, it’s maybe an hour till last call, so pretty much it’s the very end of the night.  I text him where I’m at, and says he’s coming again, but doesn’t.  So finally last call hits, and I get a text saying he is outside of the bar I am at.  I go outside, and I am surprised by what I see.  I was able to spot him out, but he definitely looked A LOT better on Facebook than he did in person.  I’ve come to the conclusion that he must be one of those people who only put up/keep good looking pics of themselves to fool everyone else into think they’re actually good looking.  We start talking, and him and his friends seem nice at first.  But then he starts acting really cocky, claiming that my friend had told him I talk shit and that he could play that game too.  Now, if you know me, you know I in fact do talk shit.  But it’s never meant in a malicious way, more so in a flirty, funny way.  Well this kid was clearly an idiot, because he kept talking shit to me but in a very attacking, malicious way.  I was super irritated, and was ready to leave with my friends, but decided to stick around with his and his friends for a little bit.  They tried to get me to go back home with them, but I was already annoyed so of course I didn’t.  I did, however,(because we all know what a softy I am deep down inside) offer them a ride home.  So I’m giving them a ride home, and at this point they’re all just talking shit, and I start thinking in my head, “Why, Leslie, why didn’t I just go hang out with my friends?  Why did I stick myself with these complete idiots?”  Basically, the entire ride to their house, it was just a bunch of shit talking coming from them.  I’m so irritated at this point, that I start being a complete bitch to them.  Not sure how we even got on some of the topics, but his friend started saying some of the dumbest shit (which will, yes, be featured in my He Said What?! page).  One that I will feature on here is the following: “D-Bag”‘s friend decided to tell me that he had slept with 95 girls.  Now, not only is this guy ugly as shit, but he has some kind of speech impediment (apparently due to a brain problem when he was younger, which I later found out, but at the time I was totally judging).  So to this, I said “There’s no way someone as ugly as you could sleep with 95 girls” (1 point for me).  Then he just got super rude and started trying to bash me saying that him and his friend would never fuck me, blah blah blah.  It got to the point where I was so irritated that I told them they were obnoxious and that they need to get out of my car about 3 blocks away from their place.  This was met with them getting out of my car and a, “Thanks Bitch” on the way out.

The next day, “D-Bag” had the nerve to formally thank me for the ride. Either he was trying to be nice, or is completely oblivious to the fact that he was such a douche (hence his nickname).  The reason I gave him a 1 & a 10 in confidence is because he’s super cocky which would be a 10, but usually people who are cocky like that are trying to compensate for something, which means they’re insecure, which brings said person down to a 1.  Although alcohol could possibly be the reason behind his outlandish behavior and excessive cockiness, it’s not an excuse – learn to control yourself when on alcohol and if you can’t, don’t drink.

*Positives: None.  Not one I can think of whatsoever.  Okay, I guess he was dressed decently.

*Negatives: Overly cocky to the point of over compensation of something (not sure what), is perhaps a homosexual with his roommate (nothing against gay men, I love them – but no point in me trying to date them, obviously – refer to my He Said What?! page for this), not attractive in any such way, cannot handle his alcohol, cannot differentiate the difference between shit talking in a rude way and shit talking in a joking way, total douche bag to my friends…..the list could seriously go on and on and on.

Second First Date?: Hell fucking no.  If I did, I would go to dinner, order the most expensive thing, and make an excuse halfway through dinner and run away.

Random: History of “Mr. Big (Past)”

Note: The nickname “Mr. Big” does not refer to anything anatomical (you sick fucks).  Refer to  *The Rules*  to understand the meaning of this nickname.

You might be wondering why I’m writing this entry, especially considering the fact that in the title of this entry I mention that this person is someone from my past.  My reasoning behind this is because I think it is important to give my audience a background of where I am coming from and to know some history about my dating life.  Also, this person played a somewhat significant role in my life for some years and I think it’s important to share this to truly understand why I am writing this blog.

Then… I met “Mr. Big (Past)” my junior year of college when I was 20 and he was 18 , just starting his freshman year of college.  Yes, I robbed the cradle…big time.  While that may not seem like a huge age gap now that I’m older, it most definitely was back then.  And yes, I got made fun of hardcore.

I went to a friend’s party a week or so before school started with a clear head.  I had finally gotten over “Dolphin Teeth” (I may reference him a bit through my blog, but I will never write a history about him because I find him to be a very insignificant person with no pertinence to my life whatsoever) and was ready to just have fun with my life and meet new guys.  The party was a lot of fun, especially because they had a hot tub, so a lot of us took advantage of that.  “Mr. Big (Past)” was one of the people in the hot tub.  I’m not too sure how he ended up at this party considering my friends were juniors and he was a freshman, but he was there.  I thought nothing of him except that he was a little freshman and it was cute how he was trying to party with the “big kids.”  I think I made him motor boat my friends boobs to introduce him to college (how nice of me, huh?).  So that was that, I didn’t think any thing of him.  The next day, my friends had a party again, and of course we were all in the hot tub again.  I knew that he lived in the dorms that were kind of by my house since I had seen him walking there the night before, so I asked him to walk me and my roommate home later on in the night.  Well, being champion drinkers that me and my roommate were, she got a little too drunk so we instead got a ride home from a friend.  Weirdly enough, “Mr. Big” still decided to come home with us.  He helped me get my roommate into our house and once we got her situated, we just talked.  At the time, I was very impressed.  We seriously sat there chatting for over an hour, just getting to know one another.  Maybe it was the alcohol, or I was feeling vulnerable, but I basically cried to him about “Dolphin Teeth” and instead of being weirded out, he comforted me and made me feel like a princess.  He was so young, so while I did allow him to sleep in my bed with me, nothing happened that first night =).  It was so nice to find a guy who seemed to sincerely care about me, even after only knowing me for a day.

So that’s how we started.  At first it was lovely, and he doted on me and called me ALL the time wanting to hang out.  He told me he thought I was the hottest girl in Boulder (which he always told me even till the end). We hung out quite a bit…and then I had to go and be ambitious.  I had decided that year I was going to be completely honest when it came to feelings, so after a couple of weeks I told him I wanted us to be together.  Well, that scared the shit out of him.  After that, he kind of retreated.  Not completely, but enough to the point where I got upset….a lot.  And that is basically how it was for 3 years.  It was always a game of who could piss the other one off more or who could make the other one more jealous.  It was so juvenile!  Because at the end of the day (or week, you know…depending on the circumstance), we’d always go back to one another.  And no matter what we did to piss each other off, and trust me we did some SHITTY things (I hit him in the groin with a half full bottle of Jack Daniels, and would sometimes drive around drunk because I knew he hated it. He hooked up with girls in front of me and would sometimes pick drugs over me ), we seemed to always still have a thing for one another.

Things got really bad around Spring-Summer of ’09, when he started getting heavily into drugs, alcohol, and partying.  I partially blame myself for this because I was the one who introduced him to the people who he participated in the intense debauchery with.  I remember at one point, he was so inebriated he started yelling at a girl who he thought owed him money, but it turns out that he didn’t even know that girl.  I wanted to help him so bad and it hurt my heart so badly that he was turning into this…thing…but there was nothing I could do.  The only people he seemed to even care about at this point was the people who were just as into the drugs, alcohol, and partying as he was.  We stopped talking for a bit when all this was happening because I just didn’t want to deal with it.  But deep down inside, I still cared so much about him.

Eventually, like all things, this phase came to an end and for the most part, he was back to his normal self.  We still did things to piss each other off and try to make each other jealous, but that was normal.  This lasted until the end, when I finally had the last of it and moved on.

Now, I know that whatever we were was not healthy at all…I knew it then too.  And I tried SO hard to get over him, even at one point dating a guy who I didn’t even care for in the least bit.  But I was just so drawn to him.  He truly was like a drug that I was completely addicted to.  In fact, I honestly thought I loved him at some point.  And maybe I did; but they say if you love someone, you love them forever and I don’t  feel that I love him now so….anyways, I finally got over him and truly did want to have a friendship, but as we all know, that never works out.

Now…He moved back to the land of the quarterback/football team who beat my poor Tim Tebow with a record 6 touchdowns in one game.  Apparently he has a “big kid” job out there.  Everything I know about him now is all hearsay, because we haven’t spoken since May of 2011.  But I have heard through a little birdie that he may be moving back here sometime soon.  And while I’m almost certain I wouldn’t go back to him ever again, I also do believe in never saying never.  So I guess we will see what happens….

At least he didn't talk like this....