Date #27: “Needy”

Note: Yes, we’re back to the pseudo-dates!!  This wasn’t actually a date, but you could pretty much consider it one the way things went.

How We Met: I met him through What’s Your Price.  He seemed like a decent man, according to his profile he is looking for “wifey material” so I thought I’d give it a try.  Not saying I’m anywhere near being ready to get married or settle down, I just thought it was sweet that he wasn’t just looking for a one night stand.  We started messaging each other and eventually I gave him my number.  And here’s where things go downhill….

-Rating (all based off website and correspondences):

*Physical Aesthetics: 6

*Appearance: 6

*Personality: 4

*Manners: N/A

*Intelligence: 4

*Confidence: 4

*Overall Rating: 4

The “Date”: So actually, this is happening/ending as I’m writing this.  I was supposed to eventually go on a date with this guy, but I’ve been so busy with work, writing in this blog, working on myself, and trying to fit in a social life somewhere in between, that I haven’t gotten around to doing so.  I’m pretty sure sometime during our earlier correspondences  I told him I was busy and that I would let him know when I was available to hang out, but apparently this guy did not understand what being busy meant.  He continued to text me quite a bit.  Now, this is obviously not an issue because what girl doesn’t love a guy texting her, and showering her with attention??  The issue arose when he would text me, and not even 5-10 minutes after texting me, if I hadn’t responded, he would ask me, “Are you awake?” or “Are you asleep?”  This becomes an issue because if I was indeed sleeping, would I fucking write back?  NO YOU FUCKING DUMBASS.  Also, is a guy that needy (for lack of a better term) that he needs me to respond immediately to his text messages and if I don’t, he has to wonder where I am and what I am doing?  Seriously, so obnoxious.  So having already been extremely irritated with this guy, I was already not wanting to meet up with him.  But I figured since I’m still doing this blog, I might as well just go along with it.  That is until tonight.  I will be posting our latest correspondences for you to all enjoy (my commentary will be in parenthetical; also,  I guess this would be a good example as to why I should get a smartphone instead of typing out our entire conversation…):

Telephone call from “Needy”….I choose to ignore this because I haven’t had “me” time in a while, where I can just sit in peace and quiet by myself.  So yeah.

1 Minute later, text from “Needy”: hello how are you just thought I’d say hi (by the way, I’m writing this all verbatim, so any spelling errors is intentional, I am an excellent speller)

-8 Minutes later, text from “Needy”: Are you still up? (Seriously??  What if I was pooping or something and I couldn’t get to my phone??  I wasn’t, but I’m just saying, it could happen)

-Moi (and here is where all the built up annoyance from our earlier correspondences is released): Wow seriously you have got to calm down…1 phone call and two text messages??…that’s pretty intense and comes off as extremely needy…not an attractive quality.  I am not always by my phone so I can’t answer immediately.  I am not in a place where I can answer phone calls at the moment. (That was a lie on my part)  You don’t have much experience with girls do you?

“Needy”: You can take it how you want to I just wanted to say hi n I have enough experience with girls how am I supposed to know you busy u never let me know that (actually I did, earlier this week I told him I was booked until next week).

“Needy” (2 minutes later): You gave me your number to call you correct? If you didn’t want me calling you shoulda gave it to me wat kinda experiAnce you gat with guys or are you the flaky wishy washy type I just thought you’d be different

-Moi: I’m pretty sure I said in an earlier correspondence that I’m a very busy person.  And yes I did give you my number so we could speak to one another, but I did not expect someone who needed copious amounts of immediate attention. (Okay, so maybe I’m being a little dramatic here…but just a little!)  I am not flaky (for people I care about…), I’m just a busy person.  I think you need someone who is as dependent as you, and unfortunately that is not me.  So I wish you good luck in your journey of finding that.  (I thought that was nice of me…yeah?)

-“Needy”: Watever.  Peace

-“Needy” (3 minutes later): And I’m not dependent or needy I just don’t play games so maybe you need someone as busy as you don’t try n make me seem desperate cause that aint me I’m just not a workaholic like you (Okay that’s fair, I may be a tad bit of a workaholic…)

-Moi: Haha not a workaholic (lie), I just have something called a life (true), that includes friends, writing (this blog!!!), working on me, and yes, work is included in that too.  Incessantly text messaging me including asking me if I’m awake only minutes after already sending me a text message is a pretty clear sign of dependency.  But like I said, I hope you find what you’re looking for.  BTW, work on your spelling and grammar, it’s horrendous.  (You should have seen some of the previous texts he sent me…I want to cringe with how awful his spelling and grammar was.  This round of text messages wasn’t so bad)

-“Needy”: Bitch whatever GO FUCK YOURSELF!  Did I spell that right cool have a nice night 🙂

-Moi: Good job, you just passed 3rd grade spelling!!  🙂  Good luck in your endeavors dear! (I’d like to think I’m pretty damn well at being facetious, wouldn’t you agree??)

“Needy”: Yeah you too 🙂

So yeah, that’s how that ended.  Probably for the best.  I could only imagine how much of a bitch I would have been if we actually went out on a date.

*Positives: He’s not just looking for a hook up, he seems to want to somewhat settle down (this could also be a negative essentially), he’s going to school to be a dental hygienist

*Negatives: He is too needy (in my opinion), has no sense of patience (something every man needs when dealing with me), has awful spelling and grammar, and needs a lot of attention

Second First Date?: No.  Fuck no.

14 thoughts on “Date #27: “Needy”

  1. I understand your annoyance and it made for a good post but this feels meaner than it had to be. Why not just the metaphorical “Ignore” button and stop responding entirely instead of tearing this guy apart?

    On the other hand, maybe this reality check will set him a little bit straighter in his dating life.

    • I see what you mean. I guess it’s just not my style to just ignore someone. I’d rather have someone tell me how it is in opposed to completely ignoring me, and that’s how I deliver as well. Though I definitely could have been nicer about it. I didn’t include this in the post, but I did already tell him in a much nicer manner just how needy he was being sometime last week, so I figured I tried the nice way. Anyways, yes hopefully he learns from this. =)

  2. This guy needs a lot of help and unfortunately he’ll probably never get it. This website sounds like it has some real winners on it!

  3. Reblogged this on smilepua and commented:
    Guys this is an example of what not to do! In a few weeks I’m going to write a post on phone game but until then learn from this post.

  4. You know, I may not have all of the ways with the ladies, but I know I don’t come across like this guy… And I have excellent grammar, even if I do splice it up with some slang. :p

    You’re just batting 1000% around here…

  5. Well, as a PUA, I don’t advocate traditional dates since they’re boring and doesn’t nothing to spark an ounce of attraction in the girl.

    As for you being busy and stuff, was that really the case, or was that your way to rejecting him? Women do this all the time BTW. They don’t want to be branded as cold-hearted bitches, so they use chic logics (which isn’t logical to men) in order to brush the guy off.

    • I’d have to disagree with you there, I think a traditional date CAN appeal to a girl, but it has to be with a guy who can pull that off, which is most definitely few and far between.

      As far as being busy, if you reread this post under the section “The Date”, you’ll notice I talk about just how busy I am. With two jobs in which I barely have a day off each week, this blog, doing everyday errands, and trying to maintain a social life, I barely have time for myself a lot of the time. Granted, if I had been more interested in “Needy” I would have definitely made more of an exception for him in my life, but because of how he approached the situation, I didn’t feel the need to prioritize him. Also, I have no problem being branded a cold-hearted bitch, in fact, I welcome it!! =)

      • Well that was m point. If the guy was someone you were really into, then you would’ve made exceptions to see him, instead you brushed him off. Doesn’t matter how busy a chic is, if a guy can spark that real attraction in her (preferably with a badboy attitude), she will drop all else.
        Sent from my BlackBerry® device

  6. Don’t you love guys like that? I get one about every other month or so. Wait til I write about my stalker one of these days, haha

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