Archive | March 2012

Date #9: “Interrogator”

Note: While this may not be considered to some as a date, due to the nature of the situation and the absurdity of this man (as you will read), I am counting it as one.

How We Met:  A co-worker of mine (thanks “Becky”!) set us up.  She’s known about my blog for some time and has wanted to help me find some guys to date/write about.  And while this set up definitely gives me something to write about, I must say it is by far the WORST set up I’ve ever had.  Haha.  I still love you “Becky”, don’t worry!!

-Rating:

*Physical Aesthetics: 4 (from what I could tell from a picture he sent me)

*Appearance: 4

*Personality: 3

*Manners: 5 (kind of)

*Intelligence: N/A (I couldn’t tell)

*Confidence: 3

*Overall Rating: 3

The “Date”:  If anyone ever says that a date cannot happen over text message, I would beg to differ.  I can honestly say that I may be one of the only people I know (if not THE only person) to have gone on a date via text message.  Yep, it happened.  While I was at work.

Like I said previously, my co-worker “Becky” has been helping me find a date over the past couple of days and suggested I check out “Interrogator.”  Although I could already tell he wouldn’t be my type (yes, I can be that shallow sometimes, determining whether I will work out with someone based on their looks), but since I told myself that I would be open to ANYONE, I agreed for her to set me up with him.  While we were at work, she sent him my number.  Almost instantaneously, I received two text messages from him stating who he was and asking how my night was.  Initially, I thought, “Okay, perfect, I found Date #9!”  But just as soon as I thought that, “Interrogator” ruined that.  After I responded, not only did he text me back instantly, he sent me a picture of himself.  No, not of down there, thank God.  Because if he did, I would have reported that to the cops!  But he sent me a picture of his face.  Now, maybe it’s just me, but I thought it was SUPER weird.  Why, within the first few minutes of speaking to someone, THROUGH TEXT MESSAGE, would you send them a picture of yourself?!  He also sent me a text within the first few texts asking me if he was bothering me.  Again, this is all within less than 10 text messages, within a few minutes of even having spoken to someone.  After that, I knew it was all going to go downhill.

We continued to converse via text for hours (from about 7pm to about 1am in the morning), with him sending me multiple text messages at a time, asking me a plethora of questions.  Now, there’s nothing wrong with asking a person questions, especially when you’re trying to get to know them.  But his questions not only seemed forced, but it was as if I was interviewing for a new job and he was interrogating the shit out of me.  In addition to this, spurts of insecurity would seep out through his text messages, making him more unattractive as the conversation continued.  There were times where the things he said conflicted with one another, for example, him saying I was pretty, but then later on, 4 or so hours later, asking me for a picture of myself (fucking creepy as shit…).  While planning our date (which was supposed to occur on Monday), he told me he was a photographer and asked if I he could take my pictures.  I’m sorry, but that shit is just sketchy.  Why the hell would I let some stranger take pictures of me?!?!?!  It was as if I had totally found a guy off of a “To Catch a Predator” type show, who takes pictures of their victims before they kill them.  No, thank you, I am not looking to die anytime soon.

Eventually, I got sick of answering a bunch of  trivial questions and told him that he should probably stop asking me questions unless he wanted us to have nothing to talk about on our date.  He proceeded to “lol” at this and ask (yes another question) if we were just supposed to not talk until Monday.  I told him that maybe Monday was a bad idea, to which he agreed to (which again, contradicts his excitement to be going on a date earlier) and we ended it at that.  I haven’t spoken to him since (thank the Lord!!).

I could tell by a lot of his messages that he rarely dates and is maybe unsure of himself when speaking to women.  He is terribly insecure and I would go so far as to say that he is possibly socially incompetent.  I was annoyed with him pretty much right off the bat.  Based off of his ridiculous text messages (which I will most definitely include in my He Said WHAT?! section), I’d say this guy hasn’t the slightest clue how socially inept he is.  For his own sake, I hope he realizes it before it’s too late.

*Positives: His job is actually pretty admirable, he helps disabled men live as normal of a life as possible or something like that.  Basically, he aids the disabled.  Besides that, no positives.

*Negatives: EVERYTHING.  His looks (based off the picture he sent me), his personality, his whole demeanor, he’s insecure, he’s socially inept, he doesn’t know how to converse in what is considered a “normal” fashion, etc.  I could go on for days.

Second First Date?:  No.  Fuck no.

Date #8.1: “Buddy”

(Note: Refer to Date #8: “Buddy” for background to this particular date)

Finally…my first second date!  Weirdly enough (or maybe not weird because I can be super standoffish and a total bitch) this was the first guy to actually want to go on a second date with me.  While some of my past dates have contacted me since our dates, it’s never been in a “date” type way; more so they’ve just wanted to talk to me and that’s that.  I guess the only exception would be “Meathead”, but there’s no fucking way I’m going down that road again, so I haven’t had the desire to contact him whatsoever.

So for our second date, “Buddy” and I went shooting!  Yes, as in guns, with real bullets, that could kill someone.  I had expressed that I had never been shooting but have always wanted to go and lo and behold, he had a gun!  So we went to an indoor shooting range out in a crappy part of town (for all of you who know where Lakeside Amusement Park is, it was a couple miles away from that).  Initially I was a bit apprehensive since the place looked super sketchy, but after walking inside and talking to the people who worked there, I felt much better.  They made us read the safety rules for the place before we actually got to shoot, which made me nervous because there were all these rules that I was scared I was going to break and then get kicked out of the place.  I’m a freak, yes I realize this.  Anyways, we got some targets and went into the shooting range.  I’m not going to lie, I was actually pretty nervous but excited all at the same time.  The only gun I had shot before then was a paintball gun (so much fun, if you haven’t gone paintballing, I suggest doing so!) which was completely different…obviously.

The gun he had I think was a handgun…he told me what kind it was but naturally, I forgot.  Even though I was scared at first, once I got the hang of it, it was SO much fun!  Most definitely a lot louder than I thought it would be, but I eventually got used to it.  I also did a lot better than I expected; I pretty much hit the target right on every time with the exception of some shots right outside the target (only like 2 or 3 shots).  I’ve gotta say, I felt like a natural!  The only thing that sucked was, being the girly girl I am, I really wanted a picture of me shooting a gun.  So in order to get a good picture, I had to stand to the side against the divider.  I started shooting, and because I was standing next to the divider, the casings bounced off of it and went down my shirt (if you k now me, I don’t have many…”conservative” shirts if you will).  I wouldn’t say it was the most painful thing I’ve ever experienced, but shit, did it HURT!  The people next to us were laughing because apparently it had happen to the girl the last time she had went (hence why she was all covered up…makes sense).  Besides that, the whole experience was a lot of fun and I’m really looking forward to going shooting again!

The reason why my left boob has burn marks on it.

Our date ended with a couple of drinks at a bar down the street from our house and just chatting it up before I had to go to work.  All in all, the date was a TON of fun and I couldn’t have asked for a better time…well maybe it would have been better if I had been smart enough to cover up and not get burned by bullet casings.  I most definitely have two burn marks on my left boob =(.

*Positives: He wouldn’t let me pay for anything again, just like the first date.  He’s super sweet, such a gentleman, lots of fun to hang out with, easy to talk to…seriously, he’s like everything a girl could ever ask for.  Except….

*Negatives: I’m just not sexually attracted to him.  I feel like an asshole for this, because seriously he’s an awesome guy in every way.  I guess it’s not only sexual, I just don’t feel “butterflies” when we hang out.  Like I have SO much fun with him, and I know I’m always going to have a great time when we hang out, but I just don’t feel those sparks.  Maybe it’s just me, but for the most part, I know when I’m going to fool around/have sex with someone long before it even happens (I’m not easy, so long literally means looooooooong).  And I just don’t feel that type of connection with “Buddy.”  If I could force myself to feel that way, I totally would, because again, I will reiterate, he is fucking awesome!  But without those feelings, I just don’t feel us progressing any farther than what we are now.  Maybe this is God’s way of punishing me for something I clearly did very wrong in my past.  Either way, I am an asshole for feeling this way.

Random: *Updates* (Dates #1-8, “Mr. Big”‘s, General)

So I’ve decided to do updates every so many dates on how everything is going concerning said dates or just in my dating life in general.  A lot of stuff happens that I haven’t really included in my blog since I just write about individual dates and men, so I thought I’d give everyone an inside glimpse to the stuff happening (meeting men, etc.) when I’m not going on dates!!  =)

*Date Updates*

Date #1: “Sunshine”:  After this date, we actually didn’t see each other again.  He’d call me to hang out every once in awhile, but apparently he didn’t think what I was doing was fun, so we wouldn’t meet up.  Last time I spoke to him, he had moved out of state for a job.

Date #2: “Babyface”: I’ve actually spoken to and bumped into “Babyface” a couple of times since our date, but we haven’t really hung out.  The last time I saw him was on St. Patty’s Day.  We just happened to be at the same bar (we were waiting for people, he was looking for his brother).  We tried to hang for a bit, but the chaos of St. Patty’s Day just got in the way and we didn’t get a chance.

Date #3: “Dum-Dum”: To be honest, we haven’t really spoken much or anything since our date.  He chatted me on Facebook maybe a month or so ago, but our conversation was really brief and we clearly had nothing to talk about.  Apparently he was supposed to move to Ohio for a job by the end of March, but didn’t get it.  Besides that, the only thing I know about him is that he is still constantly smoking weed.  Gross.

Date #4: “D-Bag”: This dumbass actually had the nerve to text me the next day to “formally” thank me for giving him and his ugly friend a ride home.  I responded with, “You’re Welcome” and haven’t spoken to him since.  I think I deleted him off Facebook not too long after that.  He claimed to my friend that he didn’t remember anything from that night (can we say alcoholic…) and pretty much brushed it off.  Weirdly enough, he hasn’t really spoken to my friend much since the incident either.  What a fucking pussy.

Date #5: “Meathead”:  He wrote me a message on Facebook about a week ago saying he had lost his phone, gave me his new number, and told me to text him (which I of course did not).  I gave him some lame ass excuse as to how I was busy with work (which is true) and didn’t have time.  Weirdly enough, this past weekend I bumped into him downtown as I was walking towards my car.  He was clearly drunk and looking at me all grossly like he used to when we were together….like the look of “I like you so much.”  Ugh.  Anyways, we spoke briefly, he told me again to text him and reminded me about the message he had sent me on Facebook, looked at me grossly, and we parted ways.  I’m pretty sure he still has lingering feelings for me from back in the day, but that ship has long sailed and passed.

-Date #6: “Ninja Monkey”: We didn’t really talk much after our date.  I would randomly see him at the gym as he was leaving and as I was just arriving, and he would give me a really awkward hug and then leave.  We’ve been seeing each other more at the gym lately and chatting a bit but that’s all.  He knows I’m super busy with work so he leaves it alone.

Date #7: “Perfect Ass“: For as close as we are, we actually haven’t spoken since he left town.  I’m really hoping he gets the job out here so he can move back!

Date #8: “Buddy”: We’ve been chatting a bit since our date.  We’re supposed to hang out tomorrow, so we’ll see what happens!!  This would be the first person I’ve gone on a second date with.  Kinda weird, but kinda cool.  He’s a nice guy.  =)

*”Mr. Big” Updates*

“Mr. Big” (Past):  Weirdly enough, a little less than a month after I wrote about him, he called me really late at night/early in the morning (what’s new…).  I missed the call and didn’t feel the need to call him back.   I thought maybe he was in town, but I’m most definitely over being called at “booty call hour,” even if that’s not what he was trying to do.  We spoke on Facebook chat maybe a week or two after he called me.  He was going to move back out here, but I guess he wants to get into finance so he’s going to stay out there and find a job in that.  He’s working for some medical company in the sales department currently.  That’s really all we talked about.  WE only ever have good conversations in person, so I’m not surprised.  I really hope he doesn’t move back….but that could make for some interesting writing in this blog if he does….

“Mr. Big” (Present):  I started talking to him again this month because I missed not talking to him.  Nothing has really change, although our conversations seem very…I wouldn’t say forced, but not the way they used to be.  Not very flirty anymore, almost seems like we’re both holding back on things to say to one another.  I actually mentioned this blog to him (but didn’t tell him of the contents or that I’ve written about him) and he was very intrigued and really wanted to read it.  I have yet to send it to him, but maybe in time if things change I will.  We’ve really only talked about very trivial things, and I honestly think it has to do with what happened with us and just the situation at hand.  I’m sure we’ll continue with this for quite some time at the rate things are going.  While I still do care about him (why, don’t ask me why…), I’m not holding my breath for anything at the moment.

*Leslie Updates*

And the best update for last….ME!!  Lately, like I mentioned in my last entry, I’ve been feeling pretty lonely and stuck.  I’ve been feeling like everyone else is moving on and finding people, and I’m kind of at a stand still.  But like always, when I feel this way, things always turn for the better.  About 2 weekends ago, I met a bouncer at a club downtown while I was waiting for my friend to get there for her birthday.  We got to talking and I didn’t think much of it, just that he was pretty cute, really nice, and was my age.  Well this past Friday, I ended up at that club and he remembered me =).  So we ended up talking a LOT of the night, just about random stuff.  I then ended up meeting some other guy that same night, at the same club, who was from Bosnia who was FUCKING SEXY.  I got pretty drunk and ended up making out with him and dancing with him.  We’ve been texting since we met so he could be date #9 (perhaps…).  He was kinda a bit too forward for me (such are those Eastern Europeans), so I gave my number to my bouncer to save me if I needed it.  But I ended up ditching the Bosnian and talking to my bouncer for the rest of the night.  I told him to call me, and he said maybe he would (rude) but I could always come visit him at work.  That kind of irritated me, but I went with it.  The next night I ended up being in the area so I went to go see him again, and we talked for awhile again.  This time, we were both definitely more flirty, so hopefully something comes out of it (maybe Date #10?).  I’m most definitely attracted to both men, more so my bouncer because we’ve actually had a legit conversation without being inebriated.  Either way, my lonely feeling has most definitely dissipated.  =)

Date #8: “Buddy”

How we met:  I’ve known “Buddy” since the 6th grade, when we were little wee ones in middle school.  We had our “core classes” or whatever together.  And if I remember correctly, I may have even had a teeny tiny crush on him back in the day.  Haha.  Sadly, after 6th grade (though he begs to differ), I don’t recall us talking much.  We would talk here and there, but it wasn’t like in 6th grade where we had class together.  We went to high school together and graduated together as well.  Since graduation, I’ve only seen him a couple of times here and there.  Last weekend though, I bumped into him on St. Patty’s Day and he was a shit show!  (Check out He Said What?!…you’ll see what I mean, it was pretty bad)  But in all his inebriation, he asked me on a date and I willingly obliged.  Plus he remembered seeing me the next day, so I’ll give him credit for that.

-Rating:

*Physical Aesthetics: 5

*Physical Appearance: 7-8

*Personality: 8

*Manners: 10+

*Intelligence: 9

*Confidence: 7-8

*Overall Rating: 7

The Date:  To be honest, I was actually pretty excited for this date.  Not because I was super into “Buddy” (because based on how drunk he was when he asked me out, I was pretty turned off, not gonna lie), but because I had been feeling pretty down lately.  Just super sad and lonely.  I can’t believe I’m even admitting that, that is so unlike me!!  But yes, I had been feeling lonely and the idea of someone paying attention to me made me really excited.  Pathetic, I know.  Even through my excitement, I wasn’t sure how the date was going to turn out, so I was a bit apprehensive about that.

So he came to pick me up, which I thought was pretty awesome considering that with all my other dates I’ve been meeting them at places (lame asses).  He got to my house, and came up to the door, and had a ROSE for me!!  How fucking sweet is that?!  That never happens anymore, and I thought it was so sweet of him to get me one.  Made me feel special indeed!!!  We went to go see a movie, 21 Jump Street which is freaking HILARIOUS, please go see it if you haven’t yet!  He tried to kiss me like towards the end of the movie, but I am a firm believer in the fact that one does not pay however much it is to watch a movie just to make out with someone…you can do that later.  So I pushed him away.  Hope that didn’t hurt his feelings too much…I definitely didn’t mean it in a rude way, just in a “Fuck off, I’m watching a funny movie” way.

How beautiful is this?!?! =)

After the movie (and actually before the movie too) we grabbed a few drinks at a bar right next to the theatre and just caught up on life.  It was really sweet, he wouldn’t let me pay for ANYTHING.  It was at the point where he started paying while I was in the bathroom.  So tricky!  Haha!  Anyways, since it had been so long since we had talked (I seriously thought it had been since middle school, apparently we talked a bit in high school…yep I felt like an ass after that ), we just caught up on everything.  He’s still friends with the majority of the people he hung out with in high school which is cool (I guess, not really my style…).  He also told me some things about people we know in common that I didn’t know before, which was super interesting…=).  I’m a Gemini, I love gossip.   Turns out, we have/had a lot of the same partying habits which is kinda funny because if you knew me back in the day, you knew what a shit show I used to be!  The one thing we most definitely do not have in common is beer choice and the fact that he enjoys Country music.  After I found those things out, I joked that we couldn’t hang out ever again.  😉  We ended the night with freezing our asses off back to his truck, him driving me home, walking me to my door, and a goodnight kiss =).

Honestly, the date was pretty much perfect.  While I’m not a huge fan of movies on the first date, the movie was so good that I didn’t even care.  Plus, “Buddy” was just SUCH a gentleman…talk about chivalry at its finest!  Most guys will just call you from their car telling you they’re there to pick you up, but he came to my door, and with a flower!  Plus, he opened the car door for me to get in and out and wouldn’t let me pay for a damn thing.  Seriously, the true epitome of a gentleman.  =)  But again, like with some previous dates that went well, I’m just not really physically or sexually attracted to him, and for me that’s the difference between a great friendship and a relationship so….

*Positives: Total gentleman, very sweet, we had great conversation, had a lot of things in common

*Negatives: He’s super short (I’m close to his height in heels), I’m not physically/sexually attracted to him, he went to my high school (I have this thing about not wanting to date guys from high school…don’t ask me why, I’m just weird)

Second Date?: Yep, I totally would!!  My only thing is is that he’s so sweet and I wouldn’t want to lead him on.  But I’m super fickle, so who knows maybe I would change my mind on the next date.  =)

Random: You hate me?!?! I LOVE you!!

The age old, cliche/quote that ruins us all when it comes to relationships at one point or another: “I want what I can’t have.”

But why?  Why are we, as human beings, so fascinated with things that we cannot attain?  What is it that draws us to something that is beyond our possession??

We’ve all been in this situation: we like a guy, or a girl, and for some reason we can’t have them.  Whether it be because they’re playing hard to get, they just don’t like us, they have issues they need to sort out, they’re just a straight up asshole, or they’re dating someone else.  And we WANT them.  BADLY.  All we can think about is them, and we won’t stop pursuing them until they are ours.  Some people even get so intense that they do crazy shit or say crazy things in order to get said person.  Usually, when this situation arises, the pursuer ends up getting hurt in one way or another, at times more than once.  Yet we continue to put ourselves through this purgatory because we so badly want this person.

Do we enjoy being hurt over and over again by dwelling on something/someone we can’t have?  It’s like something in our subconscious is saying, “Please, let me be hurt over and over and over again, just for this one person!” even though there are millions of other people out there in the world who are willing to love us just as much, or maybe even more than the prey that we keep hunting for.  Or maybe it’s society who puts this idea in our head – telling us to never give up on anything we want in life.  Which I completely agree with, and I truly think if we want something in life, we should fight for it,  but at the same time, is it worth all the pain, struggles, and tears if we continue to strive for someone yet inevitably can never have them?

I’ve seen many people go through this struggle, and I myself have many a times.  I’ve seen both sides too…the people who stuck in there and held out, fought for what they wanted for weeks, months, even more than a couple of years, and prevailed in the end.  And then there’s the people who did the same, and never “won,” if you will.  But in the process, there were many tears, lots of heartbreak, depression, sadness, and pain.  Is one person really worth pain and suffering??  And how do we know who is worth the fight and who isn’t?

But what if a person is our dreams?? What do we do then Gaga??

I think we all asked ourselves this question and want someone to just give us a damn answer already.  I wish I had even remotely the slightest clue on to what the answer is.  I struggle with this on a daily basis, with “Mr. Big (Present)” for one.  Sometimes I wonder if I’m just wasting all my thoughts, and time and tears on an individual who in time, I will most likely get over like the rest of the guys that have passed through my life.  Or is he really different than anyone else and worth fighting for?  If I choose to fight for him, will I be doing it in vain, or is this a test I’ve been given in life to see how strong I really am, and in time I’ll win?  I look at people who fought for years for someone, who stuck it out, and they finally got what they wanted and are happier than ever!  But I also see people who have fought and fought, suffered and shed more tears than they should, and in the end…they got nothing.  And then there’s people like me, who fought and fought for what I wanted (at the time “Mr. Big (Past)”), suffered through some horrible times, lots of tears, anguish, and eventually just gave up and decided that’s not what I wanted anymore.  But I look back on that time (3 years to be exact) and question whether I had just wasted my time.  I could always play the whole optimistic card and tell myself, “Oh it was a learning experience, I grew from it!”  But let’s face it honeys, I’m not getting any younger.  As a smart woman I know always says, “There’s always going to be someone prettier and younger than you the older you get.”

I’m not really sure where I was going with this entry, to be honest.  I guess I just wanted to address the fact that this is a huge dilemma throughout life, particularly concerning the relationships we go through in our lives.  It’s an issue that there appears to be no answer to.  And although it causes much suffering and heartache, we just can’t help from falling through its rabbit hole over and over again….

Note: I know I usually only write “random” entries in-between the dates I go on, but I’ve been slacking a bit on the dates, as you can see.  :-/  Anyways, I felt the need to write something since it’s been awhile since I’ve written anything, so here it is.  Don’t worry, my next entry will be a date one!!  =)

Random: Top 10 Turnons

Since my last random entry was about Turnoffs, it was only fitting to write an entry in opposition to that.  Weirdly enough, I’d have to say my turnons are a bit more strange than my turnoffs.  I don’t have your average, everyday, “If he has blue eyes, I love him!” turnons whatsoever.  Sometimes, I even surprise myself at the things that get me going.  I don’t need a guy to possess every single one of these characteristics, but it’s nice to have a few, if not more.  If I found a guy who was all of these things, you can be sure I’m making him my husband ASAP.  Again, like the turnoffs, I could go on and on forever about the things I love about men.  But I will stick to just 10.  So here, are my top 10 turnons (in no particular order):

1.) Musicians (especially singers) – Gosh, I could go on and on about this for days.  I love musicians.  Having been brought up around music my entire life and being encouraged to perform, I think this idea of musicians being sexy was instilled in my brain long before I even liked men (which was when I was 3 years old…yes I’ve liked guys since the age of 4).  I love them all: guitarists, drummers, bassists, cellists, violinists, pianists.  In fact, a guy doesn’t even have to be remotely good looking, but if he rocks his instrument, I’m in love.  I especially love guys who can sing.  Now when I say I love musicians, I’m not talking about wannabe musicians who say they are, but don’t know what you’re talking about when you tell them to play you an augmented chord or a song in a minor key.  I’m talking about musicians who truly know their stuff – who can play so smoothly you get the chills.  When it comes to singing, I like a guy who can truly sing.  A lot of guys claim they can sing, yet they’re pitchy, or breathy, or nasally, or just have something off about their tone.  And since I have such a keen ear when it comes to music, I can tell when a person is even remotely flat or sharp.  So I like guys who can, for lack of better words, sing my pants right off of me!

2.)  Athletes (especially soccer players) – I love athletes, but perhaps not for the same reason that most women do.  Most women like them because they’re hot, they (usually) make good money, and are famous.  I like athletes because they’re in great shape (yes, I understand this is a bit vain) which means they take good care of themselves.  Being so obsessed with fitness myself, I like a guy who takes care of his body and wants to look good.  Also, athletes are usually very passionate about their craft, which is super sexy in itself.  As far as soccer players are concerned, I’ve loved them since I was a little kid.  I remember running around at recess in 4th grade playing soccer, just so I could hang out with one of the boys who loved the sport (I wonder whatever happened to him…).  In fact, 50% of the men I’ve slept with are soccer players.  Enough said.

Okay I won’t lie….I just like this one because he’s super sexy.

3.) Guys who have ambitions, goals, and dreams – Nothing is sexier than a guy who has dreams for himself; who has some direction in life and has an idea of what he wants his life to be like.  I’ve dated plenty of men who had no ambitions, no goals….it was heartbreaking.  How can any guy (or anyone in general, for that matter) not have any dreams for themselves??  I don’t care if your dream is something big like becoming a huge rock star or something small like owning your own home someday…have some damn ambitions!!  To me, a guy with no goals is a guy who doesn’t really care about himself…who sees himself as a miniscule, insignificant thing in this world.  And I just cannot tolerate that.  A guy who has goals usually has a level head and has the drive to get what he wants – he’s usually not lazy and doesn’t take no for an answer.  That’s what I like.

4.) Guys who are intelligent – I don’t know who came up with the stereotype that dumb jocks are hot, because they’re not.  I’d rather myself a nerdy, intelligent man than some cocky jock who doesn’t know the difference between “their,” “there,” and “they’re.”  There’s nothing more exhausting  in this world than hanging out with a man who lacks brains.  I feel like I’m talking to a child, or maybe even something below that.  Plus with stupid guys, I usually have to explain what I’m talking about, which gets irritating when I have to stop my story every few minutes just to explain something.  I like a guy who can keep up with conversation, someone who is learned about the world, who has good things to say because he is informed, and can make intelligent opinions.  I don’t care if we end up disagreeing on something…as long as what you’re saying is formed with intelligence, we’re good.

Seriously.

5.) Guys who believe in chivalry – I hate when people say chivalry is dead, because if you find the right guy, it’s not.  Well, okay, maybe it’s not full-on 100% still in existence, but traces of it still exist and that’s all that matters.  I like a guy who opens doors for me, who lets me pass first, who will pay for me just because he wants to, who treat women like we’re God’s gift to the world, because let’s face it – we are.  I’m not saying I need a guy to pull out my chair every single time I get up or want to sit down, or a guy who pays for every single thing I want in life, but here and there is always nice.  It makes a woman feel like she’s being taken care of, and I think at the end of the day that’s all we want.

6.) Guys who read on a frequent basis – Now when I say read, I don’t mean comic books, anime, or the sports section in the newspaper (although that may be one of my favorite parts of the newspaper).  I’m talking about actual reading: a novel, a non-fiction book, a script, etc.  Something of substance that has some meaning and helps the mind grow in one way or another.  And not just reading because one is forced to read in school, but reading for pleasure.  Reading is a great way to improve daily vernacular and can be extremely beneficial in day-to-day conversation.  Also, this goes back to the whole intelligence thing – reading is stereotyped as a hobby done by people of intelligence (which is not always true), so if you’re going to be stereotyped, why not be stereotyped with something positive? =)

How sexy is this? Seriously!

7.) A guy’s guy – While there is nothing wrong with a more gentle, effeminate man, I would date a sexy gay guy if that’s what I wanted.  Let’s face it, gays take WAY better care of themselves than straight guys do.  Anyways, I like a guy who watches and plays sports, drinks beer, eats shitty food, and leaves the toilet seat up.  Yep.  I said it.  If a guy is too feminine, it freaks me out.  For a girl, even though I love to dress up and look pretty, I also love getting dirty, throwing the football, and participating in chugging contests with the best of them.  If a guy can’t keep up with that masculine side of me, we’re in trouble.  I don’t want someone who is more feminine than me – I’m supposed to be the girl in the relationship, not him!

8.) Guys who actually listen to what I’m saying – While it is well-known that men don’t listen very well and often forget what women say, I’ve dated enough men who remembered the things I have said.  Because of this, there is no excuse for a guy to forget the things I’ve told him.  Now, I know no one is perfect and a guy will forget things here and there.  Women do too.  But if I tell you something of some pertinence, I expect you to remember it.  Nothing is hotter than me telling a guy something that I really like or dislike, and then a couple months down the road he mentions it.  It shows me that he actually paid attention to me and wasn’t just staring at my tits or something.

9.) Guys who do what they say they’re going to do – I think a big reason why women don’t trust men anymore is because they’re fucking flakey as shit.  I can’t even tell you the amount of times I’ve had men tell me they were going to do one thing, and then never did it.  So when I find a guy who actually does what he says he’s going to do, it’s completely attractive.  I hate flakes in general, both men and women, so I already have a problem with flakey people.  Guys who actually keep true to their word are easier to trust and gives me (and I’m sure many women out there) reassurance that there are still some good guys in the world.

10.) Guys who are confident – Confidence is huge in a guys sex appeal.  I like a guy who is completely sure of himself and knows his worth.  A guy who walks around like he knows he’s awesome and isn’t afraid to tell the world.  Granted, too much confidence (a.k.a. being cocky)  is disgusting, but just the right amount of confidence is the sexiest thing a guy can wear.

=)

I don’t really have a type when it comes to men, but I think my turnons and turnoffs can really give a person an idea of my “type” of guy.

Date #7: “Perfect Ass”

How We Met: We met back in 2006 at a party he was throwing at his house.  At the time I was seeing (or more so hooking up) with his friend “Dolphin Teeth.”  He has always been so nice to me, right from the get go.  He truly possess what I feel is that Midwest charm – he’s genuinely polite and a true gentleman.  Plus he has a great posterior, hence the nickname – he’s not an asshole by any means if that’s what you’re thinking by the nickname.  Over some years we became really good friends and hung out every weekend at the very least.  He eventually moved back to the Midwest to live with his dad, but he comes back to town every so often.  Every time he comes into town, we make it a point to see each other at least once during his stay, whether it be going out to the bars or just hanging out and watching a movie.

-Rating:

*Physical Aesthetics: 8

*Physical Appearance: 9

*Personality: 10

*Manners: 10+

*Intelligence: 6

*Confidence: 10

*Overall Rating: 9

The Date: Before “Perfect Ass” had moved back to the Midwest, we had the tradition of going on our “Olive Garden Dates,” as we would call it, once every month.  Ironically, those dates usually always fell sometime around my period.  So what better than to go to our favorite place for this date!  Though I will say, I was not on my period for this one.  Haha.

We of course ordered our usual Alfredo dipping sauce for the bread sticks, and I had my usual Peach Iced Tea.  We ended up sharing something that neither of us had gotten before, and it actually turned out to be pretty good.  We hadn’t seen each other since he came out here for his birthday back at the end of last year, so we had a lot of catching up to do.  The last time I had seen him, he had this crazy girlfriend.  Now, when I say crazy, I mean seriously, CRAZY.  When I first met her, she seemed like a very sweet girl.  But the more I got to know her, the crazier she got.  She would yell at “Perfect Ass” for no reason out of the blue, she would physically abuse him (literally….he had marks on him one time), and completely berate him.  The thing that makes her even crazier is the fact that she never thought she was doing anything wrong; she thought everyone else was overreacting and she was sane.  She has a child who is about 4 years old (I think…) and she would expect “Perfect Ass” to stay home with her and HER kid when he came out here to visit, even though he was here to see his family and friends.  She would get mad when he would go outside on the porch to just talk to his friends and none of us liked her.  Pretty sure she hated me too, so I guess it’s all good.

The point of that whole long story is that he finally, after 2 years I think it was, ended things with her.  It was a relief to everyone.  When I say everyone, I mean his friends and family alike.  Not a soul liked this horrible girl.  I’m not sure her own child even liked her…sad day.  Anyways, we all thought he was going to get back with her after a few days or so of being broken up (as is the trend with him), but he told me he was done for good which made me happy.  It turned out he was in town applying for a job out here.  He hears back in about 3-4 weeks whether he gets the job (fingers crossed!) which means….HE MIGHT BE MOVING BACK!!  Yayyyyy!!  This also means that if he does, we may be moving in together!  No, not like that.  Just as friends of course haha!

I think the best part about dinner is that “Dolphin Teeth” called him a couple of times within the two hours we were there.  On the last call, all I could think was, “‘Perfect Ass’ doesn’t even need a girlfriend, he has ‘Dolphin Teeth'” since he had been calling so much.  My thought process was correct as “Perfect Ass” ended the conversation with an, “I love you.”  You may think I’m joking, but I can assure you I’m not.  I laughed hysterically after that and him shit the rest of the night.

We ended up going back to his mom’s house after since that was where he was staying while he was in town.  We hung out with his sisters, his mom, and  even “Dolphin Teeth” made an appearance…can’t keep two lovers away from each other for too long ;-).  We watched a horrible movie that he picked out and that was about it!

*Positives: It was a lot of fun, we always have a great time together doing whatever, there was no pressure whatsoever in anything

*Negatives: I’m super allergic to his mom’s house with all the dogs and cats they have in there, I never thought I’d have to compete with “Dolphin Teeth” for someone’s attention…hahaha

Second Date?: Duh!!  He’s one of my closest friends, so that’s an obvious no brainer.  And if he moves back, it’s going to be Olive Garden Dates at least once a month again!